London 1st April 2006 - Recruitment agents nationwide are buzzing about the latest innovation within recruitment - the Myers-Bricks Method. Recruitment is traditionally an extremely difficult field, marred by a combination of IQ-tests, personal aptitude analysis, interviews and the like - all of whom are relatively inefficient methods in assessing an employee's long-term potential or aptitude for a job.
"This is the simplest, most effective model I have seen to date" mused one recruitment specialist earlier today at the press conference.
The Myers-Bricks method breaks new ground by using toys and analysing the type of play individuals engage in as a way to quickly and effectively determine aptitude for different fields. As one of the specialists in the Myers-Bricks method explained:
"Put about 1000 bricks in some particular order in a closed room with an open window. Then send 2 or 3 candidates in the room and close the door. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours and then analyse the situation.
If they are counting the bricks: Put them in the Accounts Department.
If they are recounting them: Put them in Auditing.
If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks: Put them in Engineering.
If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order: Put them in Planning.
If they are throwing the bricks at each other: Put them in Operations.
If they are sleeping: Put them in Security.
If they have broken the bricks into pieces: Put them in Information Technology.
If they are sitting idle: Put them in Human Resources.
If they say they have tried different combinations, yet not a brick has been moved: Put them in Sales.
If they have already left for the day: Put them in Marketing.
If they are staring out of the window: Put them on Strategic Planning.
And then last but not least! If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been moved: Congratulate them and put them in Top Management.
As you can see, this relatively simple method highlights the strenghts and weaknesses in candidates quickly, and is a very effective method to recruit people for a diversity of jobs in one sitting", he concluded.
(editor's note: this is an amusing account of a non-existent press-conference concerning an entirely fictional recruitment method)
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